We rescue the famous phrase “everything can be talked about” to start by explaining why we can —and should— talk to our boss about everything that worries us. Although it is true that superiors, in general, impose a certain respect, it is preferable to face the situation and learn to relax. And although there are as many types of bosses as there are people, there is always a way to approach them and create a favorable climate. The key is to wait, wait and wait until you find the perfect moment because let’s remember that everyone can have a bad day. Patience, once again, is revealed as the mother of sciences.
According to a report by Adecco, 75% of professionals suffer from glossophobia or fear of speaking in public. It is not surprising at this point that this type of phobia also comes to light within a company. Especially if we take into account that hierarchical organizations are still predominant. However, there are several tricks that can help us cope with these moments. The two most common are:
Pay attention to what you say and, above all, how you say it
Before we go to the place where we want to have a conversation with our superior and request a meeting . We can make an outline (albeit mental) of the topics we want to deal with, as well as prepare possible questions that they can ask us. Of course, you have to be clear and concise. Once we finish presenting our speech, it is important to listen and show interest, respecting the speaking turns. And, as we have already said, the what is as important as the how. Even the how can be even more relevant in this case. For this reason, we must be very clear about the tone that we are going to use and the non-verbal language that we are going to rely on. To do this, specialists recommend looking at:
- The look: Through the look you can learn many details of another person. For example, if we keep looking, we will be giving the feeling that we are interested in the conversation.
- The posture: Above all, you have to avoid closed postures and crossed arms. The ideal would be an upright posture with the feet slightly apart.
- The smile: Careful with this! An honest smile is much more than lengthening the lips. And we don’t want to be caught with a fake smile. You can stand in front of the mirror to practice.
- The silences: Creating pauses to energize a conversation is as important as managing our words. Silences are power, security, they give game.
- The gestures: They can indicate positive or negative signals, such as interest or rejection. Here what you have to avoid is sending contradictory messages: that is, if we are showing gratitude with words, we cannot accompany it with a snort.
- The voice: Using intonation changes, having a good rhythm and avoiding fillers are the three aspects to take into account. To do this, reading or saying out loud what we have in mind, using peaks of intonation and deep breathing, is very useful.
Your attitude matters
Anyone wants to feel valued by their boss, and being negative won’t do any good. To achieve our goal we will have to keep our forms, since we must not forget that our boss is above us and that, at least, deserves respect. You also have to stay calm and avoid hesitating or making nervous movements. And, although it may seem contradictory, showing security will contribute to not having complexes or ties and will give us the freedom to talk about any topic we want to discuss. Actually, to communicate with your boss, it is enough to be natural, without trying to appear to be something we are not —because that does not usually have good results— and to be aware of the value we contribute as human capital.